How far are you willing to go? (3)
The more they looked, the more overwhelming the sight became.
They had traveled to quite a few places and seen many things. But they had never seen anything as immense and magnificent as the walls of Beijing.
“….Amazing.”
“How did people ever build something like that?”
“Where did they even get all the stone that went into it?”
“Idiot. That’s an earthen wall. They piled up soil and covered the outer surface with bricks made from fired clay.”
“Then where did they bring all that soil from?”
“……Good question.”
It was no joke. To build a wall that large, it seemed they would have to carve away an entire mountain.
“Impressive……”
“It’s huge…”
“It’s incredibly tall…….”
Watching the disciples of Hwasan, each and every one of them overwhelmed by Beijing’s walls, Chung Myung clicked his tongue.
“Bunch of country bumpkins. Never been to the Imperial Capital before?”
“You’ve been here before?”
“Of course not. It’s my first time too.”
“…”
What was the point of asking?
“Let’s go in for now. We didn’t come all the way here just to admire the walls.”
“Yes, Sasuk.”
Just as everyone was about to head towards the city gate at Baek Cheon’s words…
“Wait!”
Jwa Gohak suddenly stretched out his arms and blocked their path.
“Why?”
“Surely you aren’t planning to enter the Imperial Capital just like this, are you?”
“…We are, though?”
“Have you lost your minds? You haven’t forgotten why we went to the trouble of commissioning you, have you?”
Baek Cheon frowned as if wondering what on earth he was talking about.
“What is there to forget? You people couldn’t afford to get caught, so you came clinging to our pants, didn’t you?”
“Exactly. I’m impressed you remember so well. Then surely you also understand that we must avoid drawing suspicion as much as possible.”
“….Huh?”
“What do you think people will assume if all of you march into the Imperial Capital just like this?”
The disciples of Hwasan looked at one another.
Let’s see. Five Taoists, one Buddhist monk, and on top of that, one Confucian scholar with… a child in tow.
“Is this a sign that the world is coming to an end?”
“Is today the day the fate of Confucianism, Buddhism, and Taoism [유불도(儒佛道)] will be decided?”
“Why Confucianism, Buddhism, and Taoism, of all things [유불도]? That’s insulting to the Taoists. Let’s call it Taoism, Confucianism, and Buddhism [도유불]*.”
“Why does that matter…”
It was an undeniable fact. No matter how you looked at it, this group was strange. No, strange was an understatement. They were downright bizarre.
A group of Taoists, a monk, and a Confucian scholar walking around with a child. Honestly, it was amazing that traveling with this combination hadn’t caused any trouble.
Even if the Imperial Capital was a place where countless people came and went, making it difficult for ordinary people to attract attention, it was impossible for this group not to draw every gaze.
“This won’t do.”
“We need to find a solution.”
The disciples of Hwasan put their heads together and began racking their brains.
“How about we unify ourselves as one group?”
“Well, if there were nine monks, we would certainly be quite shiny….”
“What about Taoists?”
“Wow, look at that. Nine Taoists are passing by. In all my life, I’ve never seen so many Taoists in one place.”
“Then we should go with Confucian scholars.”
“Oh? Look at that. There are nine young Confucian scholars over there. But I don’t know a single one of them? How suspicious. Hehhehheh.”
“What do you expect us to do!”
Jwa Gohak shook his head.
“That’s why we need to disguise ourselves in the least suspicious form possible when entering the Imperial Capital.”
“What would that be?”
“Exactly as what you are.”
“What?”
Jwa Gohak flashed a pleasant smile.
“Country bumpkins visiting the Imperial Capital for the first time, amazed by everything they see.”
“…”
“You won’t even need to act. Now, let’s begin.”
“…”
⠀
“…This feels so awkward.”
Yoon Jong wore a disgruntled expression as he looked at the clothes he was wearing.
Perhaps it was because he had barely worn anything in his life besides Hwasan’s martial uniforms. The feel and colors of these unfamiliar clothes seemed strange beyond words.
“They suit you just fine.”
Yoon Jong turned to Jo Geol and narrowed his eyes.
“Hmm.”
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
“…..Never mind.”
At times like this, one was reminded that the brat was the son of a wealthy family. It wasn’t that the clothes didn’t suit him, exactly, but somehow they still looked oddly out of place. There was something bizarre about it, like dressing a pig in silk.
Still, Jo Geol looked passable enough. At least he wasn’t so out of place that people passing by would turn around for a second look.
“Oh, come on, do we really have to go this far?”
Just then, Chung Myung trudged out of the bushes after changing his clothes. Yoon Jong and Jo Geol smiled broadly at the sight.
“It’s a perfect fit.”
“At this point, Hwasan’s martial uniform would look more out of place on you.”
“…Maybe it’s because you started out as a beggar.”
“You little punks.”
Chung Myung glared at them, but the two of them merely grinned and gave him a thumbs-up.
“Is this how it’s supposed to be?”
“Hmm.”
At the sound of someone else approaching, the first three turned around.
And then…
“Pffffft!”
“Khk. Khuhuhuhuhk!”
“I’m dying. I’m really dying. My, my stomach…”
The moment they saw Baek Cheon and Hye Yeon emerge from the bushes, all three doubled over clutching their stomachs without anyone needing to say a word.
“This is impossible.”
“This isn’t going to work.”
The clothes Jwa Gohak had prepared were coarse hemp garments [조포의(粗布衣)], the kind usually worn by commoners in the Central Plains. But Baek Cheon’s face was utterly rejecting those perfectly ordinary hemp clothes. To exaggerate a little, it was almost as if his face were floating above the clothes all by itself.
“Anyone can tell he’s a young master who changed clothes to sneak out and have some fun.”
“Imagine being so handsome that shabby clothes don’t suit you. How does that even happen?”
“But if we’re talking about who looks the most out of place…”
“Isn’t this one a little worse?”
“You have a point…”
Everyone’s gaze shifted to the side.
There stood Hye Yeon, looking pristine in his hemp clothes.
“….He looks like a young Buddha dressed in hemp.”
“His skin is so white that it makes him look even stranger.”
“This really isn’t going to work.”
The mismatch between Baek Cheon, Hye Yeon and their clothes was truly painful to look at. It was so bad that Tang Soso and Yu Iseol, dressed in plain cotton clothes that made them look more or less like ordinary women, actually seemed normal by comparison.
“What should we do?”
“Should we leave them behind…”
While everyone continued to agonize over the problem, Chung Myung spoke up indifferently.
“What are you all worrying about?”
“How can we not worry? These clothes look so wrong on them. We need to find something else that suits them, but I can’t think of anything…”
“That’s not what I mean.”
“Hm?”
Chung Myung shrugged.
“Your faces don’t match your clothes, so why do you keep thinking about changing the clothes?”
“…Huh?”
Chung Myung gestured towards Baek Cheon’s face with his chin.
“We can just mess that up a little.”
“Ho.”
“Wow…”
“That’s it.”
At those words, sly smiles spread across Hwasan’s disciples’ lips.
Baek Cheon and Hye Yeon flinched and took a step back under their strangely gleaming gazes.
“W-What are you planning to do?”
“Honestly, everyone wanted to try this at least once.”
“That’s true. I had no idea I wanted to try this until now.”
“Now, now. Hold still. It’ll be over soon.”
Baek Cheon’s and Hye Yeon’s faces filled with terror.
❀ ❀ ❀
“…It’s so dazzling.”
“It’s incredibly lively, too.”
“It’s beyond lively. It feels like we could get trampled to death by the crowds.”
Their first impression upon entering the city could be summed up in three words. Huge, crowded, and clean. That was it.
And of the three, the part that made the strongest impression on the disciples of Hwasan was undoubtedly the sheer number of people.
“Move aside! Why are you blocking the road!”
“Good grief! Stop looking around and move out of the way!”
What kind of place was Hwasan?
Quite literally, a pure sanctuary of cultivation [청정도량 (淸淨道場)]. A place that did not readily allow the mortal world to approach. On top of that, thanks to having gone completely bankrupt for certain reasons, barely a hundred disciples of Hwasan now enjoyed the luxury(?) of sharing grounds spacious enough to comfortably accommodate a thousand.
What this meant was that Hwasan’s disciples had absolutely no tolerance to situations in which people were packed together like this.
“Sago. Ah, no. Sister [언니 – unni/eonni], are you all right?”
“My stomach… doesn’t feel good.”
“Good grief.”
Jo Geol, watching the scene, frowned as if he had witnessed something he shouldn’t have.
“Wait, ‘Sister’? You’re older than she is…. Aagh! [because it’s a form of addressing someone older]”
After being kicked hard in the shin, Jo Geol let out a shrill cry and jumped straight up on the spot.
“Be quiet. We can’t exactly treat Sago as someone younger [동생 – dongsaeng]. Or should I call you Auntie [고모 – gomo]?”
“……That would be even more horrifying.”
“Hey, you there! Stop blocking the road and move aside! Where did these country bumpkins come from, making busy people’s blood boil? Do you want to get scolded?”
“S-Sorry.”
Yoon Jong led the group to the side of the road and shook his head in disbelief.
“People from Beijing are incredibly harsh.”
“They’re just busy, that’s all. People in places this bustling tend to have short tempers.”
“I don’t know what is what, but I do know that it’s chaotic.”
Jwa Gohak nodded repeatedly upon hearing that.
“….What are you so pleased about?”
“Ah. It’s nothing. I was just thinking that I really did choose the right people. Haha. True acting is when you don’t need to act at all, isn’t it?”
…This bastard. Is he saying we’re country bumpkins?
“What are you talking about? Xian is a big city too, you know?”
“But Hwasan isn’t in Xian. Hwaeum really is the countryside.”
“W-We’re from Chengdu!”
“….Isn’t Chengdu in Sichuan generally considered the countryside too?”
“Huh?”
The faces of purebred country bumpkins flushed as they protested indignantly at one another.
“Still, it is….. kind of fun. We get to look around Beijing and everything.”
“Yeah. It may be hectic, but there are lots of splendid buildings I’ve never seen before.”
“But I don’t think that’s the only reason it’s fun, is it?”
At those words, everyone’s gaze turned towards the two people who had remained silent.
“…Dn’t tlk t’ me.”
“Kh. Perfect.”
“Anyone can tell he’s a bandit.”
“That time we spent with Nokrim is really coming in handy.”
Bandit. No, Baek Cheon, disguised as a ruffian [야인(野人)], had clear tears gathering at the corners of his eyes.
The hair he had secretly been proud of for its silky texture had been smeared with mud and mashed into a filthy mess, while his formerly smooth skin had turned pitch-black from whatever they had plastered over it. Even on his nose and chin, a beard made from cut hair stuck out stiffly like pig bristles.
“In the end, the face is everything.”
“Exactly. Before, even with his outer robe removed, there was something soft and delicate about him.”
“Dainty, you mean.”
“Anyway. Now, though – wa… look at those forearms. He could beat a cow to death with his bare hands.”
“…St’p l’ghing. Y’ bastards.”
Baek Cheon’s situation was pitiful, but it was not the worst.
Because the worst one was standing beside him.
“Th…… that, uh, never mind.”
“…..Amitabha.”
“Hey now. I told you not to chant, Monk. Ah, no. That’s not right. Hye Ryong.”
“But… fine and all, why Hye Ryong?”
“Then how about Yeon Ryong?”
“That’s not the point! Why does it have to be ‘ryong’?”
“We usually tack ‘ryong’ onto the names of kids who are a bit slow. Like Geum’ryong’ or Dong’ryong’.”
“…I’m really going to kill you. I really am.”
Hye Yeon’s eyes grew moist.
“Can someone really look this different just from putting on a wig?”
“Isn’t it fascinating? I never imagined there could be someone who looked better bald.”
“Who cares? He looks like a local country bumpkin. It’s perfect.”
“…Has it not occurred to any of you, Siju, that if putting a wig on someone makes him look strange, perhaps the wig is the problem.”
“Uh..”
“No.”
“Not really.”
“…You punks.”
“I think Hye Ryong just swore.”
“Oh, come on. No way. You must have misheard him.”
Everyone looked at the two of them with satisfied expressions. The disciples of Hwasan had neatly proven that while making a person look impressive was incredibly difficult, ruining a handsome person was something that could be done in an instant.
“Grrr….”
Baek Cheon ground his teeth and opened his mouth.
“We didn’t come here to have fun. Let’s accomplish what we came for and get out of here.”
“We could take it a little slower… Agh! Aah! I’m sor….. Aaaagh!”
Yoon Jong stared blankly as Jo Geol was ultimately seized by Baek Cheon and dragged out of sight behind the alley, then let out a resigned sigh.
“He always has to add one more thing and get himself beaten.”
“Exactly.”
He is practically asking for a beating. He really does.
Special Spinoff Chapter 59 >>>
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*유불도(儒佛道) – rúshìdào – is a traditional way to refer to Confucianism, Buddhism and Daoism. The joke here is probably that they are trying to change this established expression in favor of Taoism.
As for how Baek Cheon was speaking after ‘becoming a ruffian.’ He was rly missing whole syllables, he was just speaking barely opening his mouth. About Baek Cheon’s outer robes. They are saying that even exposing his arms, removing his outer robe, he still managed to look soft, not as much as a “dude” they wanted him to look like.
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