You can do it. (2)
The sky was blue. Even the clouds had cleared away, a pure blue sky.
Having gazed for a long while at this unusually clear, high morning sky, Jang Ilso suddenly realized it had been ages since he had last seen such a sight.
Nothing obstructed his view. Only the sky filled his entire vision. It felt as if it could stretch on without end.
After gazing silently at the dazzling spectacle for a while, Jang Ilso finally opened his mouth.
“…..I see.”
His voice, though drained of strength, somehow sounded a little more at ease.
“So I… lost, did I?”
It wasn’t his first defeat.
A life that could not be called long, yet not short either. That life was filled with countless victories and defeats. At times he won, at times he lost. And at the end of it all, he had arrived here.
But Jang Ilso had never lost at the moments when he absolutely had to win. In that sense, this moment was the first ‘defeat’ he had ever faced in all his life.
Chung Myung answered in a flat, dry voice.
“…Who knows.”
Thud.
As if he could no longer hold out, Chung Myung finally slumped down as well. It was a raw, unrefined act, stripped of even the slightest dignity.
Staring blankly at his legs, now robbed of strength, Chung Myung let out a faint chuckle. No matter how he looked at it, his appearance must have been pathetic.
It truly had been a difference as thin as a sheet of paper. Perhaps it would have made more sense if Chung Myung, rather than Jang Ilso, had been lying there now.
“Well, I can’t exactly say I look like a winner either.”
“…Huk.”
Jang Ilso let out a quiet laugh. Hearing those words from Chung Myung, it finally felt real – the fact that he had lost.
Surprisingly, it was not particularly painful. He clearly knew that everything he had ever desired had crumbled in this moment, but somehow it no longer seemed to matter at all.
Instead of the emptiness he thought he would inevitably feel, only a question remained.
“Why?”
Jang Ilso asked without even turning his gaze. His pale eyes were only looking up at the distant sky.
“Why did I lose? There shouldn’t have been a single reason for me to lose.”
Chung Myung gazed vacantly at Jang Ilso.
There was neither resentment nor anger on Jang Ilso’s face. Perhaps that was why Chung Myung opened his mouth so easily.
“Because there’s nothing.”
“…”
“Because behind what you’re trying to achieve, there’s nothing. So for you, this is the final destination.”
“Final…. destination?”
Only then did Jang Ilso tilt his head slightly and turned his gaze to Chung Myung. His eyes were filled with incomprehension.
Chung Myung nodded as if he understood and continued to explain.
“I have never really wanted to bring you down. I only wanted the world that would come after bringing you down.”
Jang Ilso simply listened to Chung Myung’s words with an ambiguous expression.
“If I could have that world, whether I won or lost against you didn’t matter. But that wasn’t the case for you. You didn’t yearn for the world after this fight. All you ever wanted was the fight itself.”
“…”
“In a different sense from mine, it didn’t matter to you whether you won or lost. Not once you had reached this point.”
Chung Myung smiled weakly.
“In the end… it was never really your concern.”
Jang Ilso, quietly observing Chung Myung with half-opened eyes as if contemplating him, shifted his gaze back to the sky. Then, he murmured as though releasing a long-held sigh.
“The world after that…….”
Was that really true? Had there truly been nothing behind it all for him? Thinking it over, Jang Ilso smiled bitterly.
“No. I think there was.”
“…”
“Surely there was.”
“Yes. Probably.”
Ambiguous as the words were, Chung Myung slowly nodded, as if he understood, and as if he acknowledged it.
Jang Ilso had nothing. No world beyond this. But there was someone for whom such a world certainly existed. Someone who used to speak of that world.
‘Gemyeong-ah……’
Calling out that name silently, Jang Ilso chuckled quietly.
It wasn’t that it had never existed from the start. He had cast it aside with his own hands. To seize not what comes next, but the present. He lost what he should never have lost. He discarded what he should never have discarded.
Jang Ilso called that a ‘resolute decision.’ But Chung Myung called it Jang Ilso’s ‘fatal mistake.’
Who was right? He couldn’t tell.
Yet, there was one thing he knew clearly.
If Ho Gamyeong were by his side now. Even if only the corpse were next to him. Wouldn’t he at least have laughed, saying how fitting this all was? Wouldn’t he laugh to the fullest at the death he would soon meet and the end of all this?
Jang Ilso chuckled weakly.
“That’s really… strange, isn’t it.”
“…”
“Nothing has changed. I’m still myself. Yet… without Gamyeong, it feels as though I’m no longer truly myself.”
Chung Myung looked towards the place where Jang Ilso’s gaze had reached. The sky. Perhaps, for the first time, they were looking at the same thing.
“It’s not strange.”
“…Huh?”
“It’s not me who makes me who I am. Well, it sounds odd, but…”
“…No.”
Jang Ilso agreed with Chung Myung’s words.
“I think I understand. Those strange words.”
Chung Myung stared vacantly at the composed figure of Jang Ilso. Soon afterward, he silently turned his head away.
A brief silence drifted between them.
Two people who could understand, and yet had long since drifted too far apart to truly do so, were only now, belatedly, grasping the meaning contained in each other’s words.
At the end of that silence, Jang Ilso let out a little snicker and opened his mouth.
“We’re not exactly the sort to get so sentimental, are we?”
At some point, Jang Ilso had returned to gazing at Chung Myung with his uniquely sly smile.
Even though he had been defeated, even though he no longer had the strength to be a threat to anyone, he was still Jang Ilso. With that smile, Jang Ilso was proving himself.
Chung Myung felt a question rise. Why was it, he wondered, that those eyes felt so familiar? To him, Jang Ilso was someone who should have remained a stranger, always beyond his reach.
“The game ends here.”
Depending on how one hears it, it could sound as though he meant to take Chung Myung’s life, but in truth, the real meaning was that it was time to take his own.
“You know. This isn’t child’s play.”
Of course, Chung Myung knew that well.
That’s what war is. Once lives have been exchanged, it cannot end with just a few words. No one can accept such a conclusion. Chung Myung was no exception.
“Unless…….”
Crack.
Jang Ilso slowly moved his hand.
No, it wasn’t just his hand. In an instant, his body rose like a ghost. Then, with a distorted smile, he faced Chung Myung.
“You didn’t think I’d let go of everything, did you?”
Chung Myung let out a small, dry laugh.
“As if.”
Right. That’s the kind of people they both were.
So long as they moved, they could not stop. They didn’t know how to stop on their own. And so, there was no choice but to cut it off.
Shrrrring.
Chung Myung unfastened the sheath from his waist and drew his sword.
Thunk.
Having lost its blade, the empty sheath fell to the ground.
Having lost its sheath, the sword could do nothing but cut. For it has no place to rest, no place to return to.
Using the sword as a prop, Chung Myung forced himself up, wrenching his uncooperative body upright with grim determination.
He stepped forward, stubbornly, towards Jang Ilso, who stood there waiting for him.
Strangely, his steps felt heavy. Or perhaps that was only natural?
Well, he wasn’t sure.
He couldn’t tell if it was his physical burden, the heaviness of his heart, or perhaps something else unknown to him, pressing down upon him.
He knew only that every step he took towards Jang Ilso, each step meant to sever his head, was unbearably arduous.
It was someone who deserved to be called an enemy. No – perhaps a word he did not even wish to put to his lips… an archenemy might have been more fitting. Such a man, and yet – could it have been possible he had come to deeply understand someone like Jang Ilso?
But even if that were true, it could never be the answer.
Because understanding something with your mind didn’t necessarily mean sympathizing with your heart. And understanding did not necessarily mean feeling a sense of kinship.
Chung Myung knew it too. That perhaps Jang Ilso might have been another version of himself. Had Chung Myung lost Hwasan, he might have turned into a devil far worse than Jang Ilso.
Yet, even knowing this, he could never forgive Jang Ilso. Not ever, no matter what.
But if so… why did these few steps towards him felt so burdensome and so distant?
Step.
At last, forcing himself forward, Chung Myung stared straight at Jang Ilso.
Jang Ilso simply waited quietly. Gone was the unique mischievous expression, and mockery that had once filled his eyes faded.
It was strange. Once he set down all the things that made Jang Ilso ‘Jang Ilso,’ he looked oddly peaceful. Like a man shrugging off clothes that didn’t fit.
One step.
The distance was now enough for his sword to reach. Chung Myung stopped there and stared blankly at Jang Ilso.
It didn’t suit him. That expression, the vast sky stretching wide behind him. And…
Crack.
He tightened his grip on the sword. The Dark Fragrance Plum Blossom Sword. A sword symbolizing the friendship between the Tang Clan and Hwasan, between Tang Gunak and Chung Myung.
The blade trembled faintly. It shook as if convulsing, as if crying out, yet refused to move forward.
Chung Myung bit his bloodless lips. However desperately he tried, the sword stayed still and would not obey his will. In confusion, Chung Myung opened his mouth.
“I……”
He didn’t know what he wanted to say, or what he even wanted to do. Everything seemed so mixed up that it felt empty, like a lone boat adrift on a boundless sea, pushed and tossed without direction.
Jang Ilso watched such a Chung Myung with eyes sunk deep.
“…how weak.”
Then, slowly, Jang Ilso raised his hand. A painfully blue light gathered around his slender, pale fingers.
Blue flame bloomed like a tattered flower.
“I told you. The one who hesitates…… will lose.”
Chung Myung stared blankly at the blue flame igniting at Jang Ilso’s fingertips, fully expecting it would soon pierce his heart.
He couldn’t comprehend what he was feeling at this moment.
Suddenly, Jang Ilso’s previously calm eyes flared intensely.
Then, Chung Myung saw it.
A figure clad in white, rushing fiercely towards them, cutting through the pack of Red Dogs, who filled the space behind Jang Ilso.
As Chung Myung looked at him, Jang Ilso’s gaze also shifted in that direction.
“Chuuuuuung Myuuuuuung-aaaaaah!”
He – Baek Cheon – was running towards them, shouting as if in anguish.
In that instant, a chilling sense of peril pierced through Chung Myung. The corners of Jang Ilso’s mouth rose, twisted high.
Chung Myung’s eyes briefly met Jang Ilso’s gaze, and then Jang Ilso turned completely around, facing away from Chung Myung.
“Enough…….”
“Stooooop!”
Baek Cheon roared. As his sword shone red, Jang Ilso’s blue flame swelled and raged in an even deeper blue.
Two colors that seemed destined never to mix collided in front of Chung Myung’s eyes, each desperately crushing the other.
Fwooooooosh!
The world was enveloped in flames. At least, that’s how it appeared to Chung Myung. Flame as cold as the deep of dawn was tearing at Baek Cheon’s flesh.
Thuuuk!
Flicker.
The overwhelming deep blue that had consumed everything vanished instantly, washed away without a trace. In its place emerged a gentle sky-blue light.
Chung Myung stared blankly at his sword. Blood trickled in droplets along the white blade. His sword was plunged deep into Jang Ilso’s back.
The sensation of cold metal piercing a still-warm heart burned itself indelibly onto Chung Myung’s fingertips.
Baek Cheon, who had been rushing forward, froze in place.
Perhaps everything had suddenly stopped without anyone noticing. Baek Cheon, Chung Myung – even the world itself.
And so, the only thing Chung Myung could see was Jang Ilso’s back.
Why? Why…
Strength drained quickly from Chung Myung’s body. His powerless body slumped. It seemed his shoulder would come to rest against Jang Ilso’s.
Yet their shoulders never touched. The cold sword remained firmly wedged between them.
At that moment, something touched Chung Myung’s head.
Tap.
What could it be? Jang Ilso was clearly facing away. No – he didn’t want to know. Perhaps now it no longer mattered at all.
A quiet voice reached his ears.
“Look at this.”
“…”
“You can do it.”
Strangely, that voice was nothing but gentle.
Jang Ilso slowly raised his head. It seemed as though he was looking at the sky – but perhaps, he saw something else entirely.
“Even so, it was rather… enjoyable.”
Jang Ilso’s body slowly crumbled. Without realizing it, Chung Myung reached out and grabbed the hem of his clothes.
Riiiip.
But Jang Ilso’s worn-out garments tore all too easily, slipping through Chung Myung’s fingers as his body collapsed to the ground.
Thud.
Like someone in a trance, Chung Myung stared at Jang Ilso, now lying there.
That profile, that face drained of color. Those lips, faded to pale blue.
Yet, Chung Myung saw nothing clearly. He was staring right at him, but he saw nothing at all. What sort of expression was Jang Ilso making?
Only…
“Chung… Myung-ah.”
Baek Cheon hurriedly approached, grabbing Chung Myung’s shoulder. His firm, solid grip felt like he was desperately trying to hold onto someone drifting away.
“Are you…… all right?”
Chung Myung could not understand this question. Nor could he understand why Baek Cheon wore such an expression.
Chung Myung’s gaze drifted somewhere distant – towards the wide-open blue sky, and to something far beyond it.
“…..I’m fine.”
His fingertips were cold.
“I’m fine, Sasuk. It’s nothing at all.”
Baek Cheon tightened his grip on Chung Myung’s shoulder even more, as if desperately trying to hold onto a handful of slipping sand.
“All right.”
“…”
“Leave it to me now.”
Chung Myung smiled faintly.
Strangely, at least at this moment, he found himself envying Baek Cheon’s stubborn, unwavering resolve.
The sword slipped from Chung Myung’s grasp.
Thud.
The moment the sword touched the ground, Chung Myung’s body collapsed with it. Baek Cheon quickly supported him, putting Chung Myung’s arm around his own neck, holding him tightly so he wouldn’t fall after exhausting all his strength.
With his lips pressed tight as if barely holding something back, Baek Cheon spoke in a voice tinged with inexplicable emotion*.
“…You did well. You damned brat.”
A faint smile tugged at Chung Myung’s slackened lips.
‘Right?’
Within a vision gone black, he could faintly see the figure of one person smiling brightly.
‘Sahyeong.’
Within that vision, Chung Mun smiled at him brightly, brighter than ever.
________
*In Korean it’s normal to say a “voice tinged with wetness” – implying it’s sadness/sorrow/holding back tears etc. But in English it just sounds weird. Adding this for context of Baek Cheon’s emotions.
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WOOOO HOOOOO!!! It should be a worldwide holiday… HOW LONG HAS HE BEEN SURVIVING. OMG… omg guys im so happy. my hands were literally shaking for 15 minutes after first reading the chapter.
But at the same time this is so sad. Jang Ilso purposely aiming for Baek Cheon to help Chung Myung finish him off… im still processing this.
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Return of the Mount Hua 
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